The harder the struggle, the more glorious the triumph

When I began my journey in 2008, I honestly had NO IDEA what to expect. I had never been an athlete, so I had no base to go from. I had always made BAD food choices. ALWAYS. All I knew was that I was B.I.G. and I was going to die if I didn't get the weight off. I didn't start off with a goal weight or goal size in my mind. I started off with the simple desire to live.

People (my family, my husband, my kids, friends) often ask me "Jenny, why do you think you got so big?" And I really don't know. I mean I KNOW it was because I didn't move and I ate really bad food, but why I let myself get SO big, I really don't  know. It was this vicious cycle. This bigger I got, the bigger I let myself get. Does that make sense? It was like I started to see myself as ONLY the fat wife, the fat mom, the fat friend, the fat daughter, the fat sister. It seemed I was destined to live in this fat world I had created for myself. Until suddenly destiny threw me a curve ball.

I remember my "a-ha" moment like it was yesterday. I was attempting to play with my kids, I was having fun, and suddenly I was on the ground, crying and in serious pain. I couldn't move. I couldn't get up. I couldn't even lift my upper body to rest on my elbows. I was THAT big. I could only lay there crying for my husband. One of my children ran inside to get him and he came out to help. He tried to get me off the ground, but he couldn't. He had to roll me on a blanket and drag me inside the house. I knew at that point I HAD to change. I was a stay-at-home-mom. My health was poor, I was pre-diabetic, triglycerides were through the roof, high cholesterol, you know I had all the symptoms of being a morbidly obese woman. My doctor had told me that I HAD to lose weight, but I didn't listen. Family (namely my Grandpa Dick, RIP Grandpa) worried about me and encouraged me to lose weight. I didn't listen. It took THAT moment to make me listen. Laying on the ground having my kids (who were 2, 3, 4 at the time) look over my body was almost like an out of body experience. I imagined myself home alone with them and suddenly collapsing from a massive heart attack and dying right in front of them. My three little babies. My three little birds. How could I do that to them? How could I have done this to myself? And then suddenly, destiny presented me with the option to take a new road. And I took it. I didn't know where that road would take me, but I knew it had to be better than the one I was currently on.

I embarked on a new path, a new life, taking along with me three amazing little children, and one husband, and our life will never be the same. I lost 212 pounds. AN ENTIRE person. Destiny knew what she doing.

Comments (2) -

  • Thank you for sharing your story.  While I *was* athletic when I was younger, I am so totally not that right now.  The idea that you're stuck in the role of "the fat wife, the fat mom," etc. is spot-on.  I've just gotten used to the idea and it is hard to break apart your entire lifestyle (because it supports that stereotype) and change it into something that will promote health and physical activity.  

    This post adds more fuel to my fire.  Thank you so much.  I only just discovered you, so perhaps you've already written about it, but I'd really like to hear about the start of your journey, because it's the hardest part.
  • Hi Cara,
    I am brand new to telling my story and I'm telling it in bits and pieces.  I think next Friday I'll do my "come to Jesus" post about the start of my journey! Hope you'll tune in Smile

    -Jenny
Comments are closed